Morning fights

Kayden and I have been having some big battles before school with her getting dressed. It has nothing to do with the time (she is up 2 hours before school starts) and it has nothing to do with school (she loves school). It is all because she likes to be naked and because she likes to choose. I've worked through all the love and logic I know - do you want to pick or do you want Mom to pick? do you want the red shirt or the green shirt? do you want to dress yourself or do you want help? All the answers are adament "NO!" and then some flailing about. It got so bad that I was sitting her in my lap and holding her in place with my legs when I dressed her. THEN she started taking OFF the clothes after they were on. So I started getting her dressed and strapping her immediately in her car seat. The second day of that I realized this was absurd and I needed some help to figure out something else that might work.

I emailed her teachers and asked for help. I explained the situation and said that I knew it wasn't their job to help me at home, but that they work with that age and they might have some hints. Plus, the kids have to wear a uniform to school. Certainly I am not the only parent that has the battle with school clothes in the morning.

Her teacher responded and said that it was age appropriate for her to be doing that and very common. She suggested a change in the morning routine (getting dressed right after breakfast instead of breakfast, play, get dressed). But then she said that if that didn't work, I was welcome to just bring her to school and they would take care of it. She said it is referred to as the "walk of shame" and that her own son did it last week (he's 4). Typically, she told me, it only takes once and then the kids start cooperating.

I wasn't optimistic the next morning that she would get dressed, but I knew there would be no fight and that made me happy. We started the getting dressed process right after breakfast. ONE HOUR later, it was time to leave and Kayden was in her diaper. I packed up her school clothes in her little bag and loaded her up.

When we got to school, the office secretary poked her head in the car at carpool and said, "Oh, pumpkin, do you not feel good today?" To which I responded, "No, she simply chose not to get dressed." We pulled up to her drop off and her teacher opened the door. She looked at me and said, "I was going to ask if you had gotten my email, but I see you have." I told her that Kayden wanted to fix her hair but didn't want to get dressed so her clothes were in her bag. Kayden took her teacher's hand, looked up, and said, "I'm not wearing any shoes." I wanted to say, "you aren't wearing ANYTHING"

I picked her up from school in her uniform and all smiles. The following day she told me she was not going to get dressed. I gathered her clothes, put them in Keeley's room while Keeley got dressed, and walked away. Kayden decided to get dressed. :-)

I have a feeling we'll have this repeated periodically when she is feeling particularly strong-willed, but at least I know it won't have to end in a fight now!